9.29.2006

Shopping Seasonal Bi-Polar Disorder

How sychzo did I feel while shopping for my garbage bags, toilet paper, and band-aids. I wandered through my local "ghetto" Target store on a chilly damp Friday night. I LOVE my local "ghetto" Target store, its my local "ghetto" Cub store that I often dream of maneuvering a back-ho right through the produce department. As I wandered my local Target store using my Eagle Eye vision, looking for those little orange stickered items (clearance and reduced priced items) I found myself at the far end of the store near the Seasonal area. Last week it was school supplies this week it is Halloween decorations and costumes and unnecessary dust collecting collectibles. The double personality of the the Seasonal Area hit me as the Halloween decorations were in the same aisle as the Christmas decorations. Together- on either side of the same aisle. Turn your head to the left- a creepy rubber skeleton with bloody bugged eyes is looking across the isle to my right where Frosty the Snowman small glowing plastic figurine is smile ever so blissfully over towards rows upon rows of ceramic pumpkins, some white, some bronze, and some your standard orange. This was definitely too much for me. That wasn't one step over the line, that was 22 miles over the line. Guess what? It is only September 29th. Only 7 days past the fall equinox and 30 days before Halloween and 3 months before Christmas. Maybe Santa comes early in the ghetto.

9.27.2006

Blind Date Bye Bye

I knew within 20 minutes that this would be the last time I would ever see him- He brought up children 4 times in the first 40 minutes- I had never met him before- It was apparent this blind date was going to end early and it did with an affectionate HUG- And yes he made me pay for his movie ticket- And don't give me "its 2006" -It was a FIRST DATE

9.25.2006

I HEART Wayne


Shurre wish he would have "signed" my Ass!

9.24.2006

We All Love Wayne










9.20.2006

Morning Insomnia

Any of you suffer from morning Insomnia? Like in my case you have your alarm set for 6:00 am so you can hit snooze until 6:30 am but you wake up for no reason at 4:15 am or 5:00 am- And forget about sleeping in on the weekends- Those days you are especially Bright Eyed and Bushy Tailed at some ungodly hour- Yeah me too until this morning when I slept through my alarm- I hope I sleep tonight as well as I did last night

9.18.2006

New Squisshed Penny Locations

I noticed there are some NEW Squisshed Penny locations in the great state of Minnesota- I have some awesome day road trips ahead of me- If I can ever find time with my active social life- See ya out on the open roads!

Taylors Falls- Interstate Park, MN
Red Baron Museum, Marshall, MN
MOA
Rosedale

9.15.2006

A Little Rusty at Setting Up a Date

Okay so I may have made a total FOOL of myself- I left a message on a guy's phone who I have never met (a third party thinks we are a match) And I didn't prepare myself for the answering machine- Unprepared, I left a real idiotic message- Something like

"well if you wanna hook up this weekend send me an email"


Yep- I said HOOK UP to a guy I have never met- I am an IDIOT-

9.13.2006

Emptied the Inbox

Have you ever let your email INBOX get so full that you accumulated over 1000 emails- Just sitting there from over a year old- Well I did- I just emptied it out and it took me less than 5 minutes to do- Well 800 of them were old Horoscopes-

9.07.2006

Funny Guy with a Funny Joke

Giggly Lady: Hey Funny Guy, every have a hemorrhoid?

Funny Guy: Sure, I've had them for years.

Funny Guy: The only one who has never had a hemorrhoid is the Perfect Asshole

Me:


9.03.2006

No Seconds For Me

If you have a bumper sticker on your car that reads
I YPAINTBALL
or you have a tattoo of a Gecko on your lower back hip
don't expect a second date from me

9.01.2006

WHISKEY 101

Whiskey is distilled from a fermented mash of grain, usually corn, rye, barely or wheat- Then aged in oak barrels- The liquid is clear before placed into the barrels- In America whiskey must be distilled at less than 190 proof and bottled at no less than 80 proof-

American Whiskey comes either blended or straight- Straight whiskey is aged in charred oak barrels for a inimum of two years- Blended whiskey is a blend of one or more straight whiskeys and neutral grain spirits-
Blended Whiskey
Straight Whiskey


Non-American made whiskeys are spelled without the e- Like Canadian only produced in Canada and Irish produced only in Ireland- Canadian Whisky is usually distilled from corn and rye- Most Canadian Whisky sold in America is at least 3 years old- Irish Whisky is like Scotch a blended whisky containing barley malt and grain and generally aged for a minimum of 5 years- Irish Whisky is lighter in flavor and less smoky than Scotch
Canadian Whisky
Irish Whisky


Scotch Whisky is produced only in Scotland and come either blended or single malt- Single malt Scotches are aged for at least 8 years if not considerably longer- Flavors vary from the regions they are produced- Blended Scotch contain malt whisky and grain whisky similar to American Whiskey- Blended Scotch is at least 4 years old
Scotch Whisky

Kentucky Borbon was born over 200 years ago from natural spring water in Kentucky- America's only native spirit- Bourbon is distilled from a mash of grain- 50% Corn and balanced by barley and wheat or rye- Some bourbon reciepes are generations old and many family formulas jealously guarded since their births- Most Bourbons are age from 4 to 12 years and bottled at 80 proof
Bourbon Whiskey- Kentucky

Next time we will discuss Brandy
Cognac
Brandy- Imported
Brandy-Domestic

Brandy- VS
Brandy-VSOP

Brandy- XO

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