3.30.2006

Went to Church and Didn't Burst into Flames


I accompanied my parents to church last Saturday evening- I don't remember the last time I went to church when it wasn't a wedding or funeral- It has been a looooong time- As I walked through the front doors I was waiting for my flesh to begin to heat up and blister then sizzle and finally burst into red hot flames- Didn't happen- Jesus must shrly love me- I told my mother that I was brining my camera and she said I couldn't sit near her- As we pulled into the parking lot I don't remember what the conversation was about but she said everyone inside would be old and I would be the youngest person there because the younger generations don't go to church anymore- I asked if I would win a prize - She laughed- Yeap, I didn't win that Free Ipod prize with the pre-programmed religious hymns & gospels- And I WAS the youngest person there- I was SO tempted to pull out my camera a couple times during the service- I wouldn't say I was bored but very pre-occupied by all the beautiful stained glass windows and statues- My mother was telling me that during their first visit to this charming church, they wondered who the statues were of- There had to be 6 life size statues inside- I immediately pointed out Jesus for her- I do remember what he looks like or the Anglo-Saxon historical version- My parents don't belong to this parish but came upon this charming little church on the West side of Saint Paul one recent afternoon- They enjoyed the priest and church so much that they had to go back - My mother said she liked the priest because he was concerned with Social and Political Justice- And his message was not Preachy- He allowed you to think for yourself about his message instead of being force feed, to the point where you begin to gag- Oh wait, that is my own interpretation of church- Personally, I would like a more interactive church service where you could raise your hand and ask the priest to "explain in great detail the crap, excuse me, information he just rattled off- It has too many variables"- Oh listen to me here, I have gotten off the subject- As I was saying- Me, I did pull out my camera after the service ended and took some photos of the windows- Hell, you won't see me back in there unless it is for my funeral- All the little frosty haired people walking past me, probably thought I was strange and UNHOLY- My camera batteries were low and the stained glass windows are actually more colorful- Very saturated color- The SS stands for Sassy Saratee, of course

3.26.2006

Sunday Mornings



My Sunday mornings are spent on the internet listening to the local country radio station because they play Vintage Country until 10am- So a Sunday morning without John Denver is an incomplete morning- Country Roads take me home to a place I belong.....Mountain Mama- Take me home, Country Roads- Colorado Rocky Mountain High- I have seen it rain a fire in the sky.....Softer than a lulaby- Rocky Mountain High Colorado- You fill up my senses like a night in the forest, like the mountains in springtime, like a walk in the rain, like a swarm in the desert, like a sleepy blue ocean- You fill up my senses, Come fill me again- Come let me love you......Let me drown in your laughter- All of her days have gone soft and cloudy, All of her dreams have gone dry, All of her nights have gone sad and shady, she's gettin ready to fly away, Fly away, fly away, Fly away- Well life on the farm is kinda laid back- Ain't much an ol country boy he can't hack- Early to rise, early in the sack- Thank God, I am a country boy-(insert your own Weehoo) I miss John Denver- Some people probably wish Jerry Garcia never died, or Kurt Cobain, or Johnny Cash- I wish John Denver was still here- We have history- A long time ago, it used to be Sunday nights when he was often a guest on the Muppet Show- I miss you, John

3.25.2006

S=A=D

A hurts D
S hurts A
D hurts S
Karma has come full circle
It spells-----SAD

3.21.2006

I Sure Damn, Hope So

3.17.2006

The Reason for Her Absence...In the Hospital

Ms Saratee apologizes to all her readers for her week long absence- She was admitted to the hospital earlier this week and if all test come back negative, the doctor said she will be released tomorrow- I can tell you all are very worried and are wondering what has happened-Apparently, Ms Saratee has suffered some serious complications from her "healthy lifestyle" change- The drastic change to her diet had Saratee hearing voices, which appeared to be her stomach making very odd rumbling & gurgling noises- It appears her previous daily diet of heart shaped Wendy's chicken nuggets and 2 doubled whiskey cokes were easier on her body than the new daily diet of tuna on a bagel, small salad with light dressing, strawberry yogurt, string cheese, celery & carrots sticks, and 60 ounces of water- And if that wasn't enough change, her 2 sessions a week of a 30 minute cardio on the treadmill at the highest incline no less, seems to have put all..... ALL her muscles into spasms (especially her hamstrings and left neck/ shoulder muscles) She is resting peacefully now- She has her Vicodin and a small flask of brandy- You can send her your well wishes- She will be up in running yet again on the treadmill at the highest incline very soon-

3.12.2006


Movies Saratee has recently seen:

Suspect Zero-Intense Thriller
Typical storyline- A FBI agent, who in the past had made some wrong investigative choices and now a serial-killer baits him, in order for the serial killer to get his plans delivered.

Saratee Says: This movie was a gamble- I had never heard of it and I actually liked it- It heightened my senses so while I was trying to fall asleep I had heard a noise- I thought someone was in my house- I systematically went through every room, closet, behind doors, and even behind the shower curtain to make sure no one crawled through a window and was going to kill me. Two Thumbs Up

The Exorcism of Emily Rose-Intense
This movie was your typical horror- It probably doesn’t need an explanation.

Saratee Says: Except the scary scenes took place in flashback nature during court testimonies- The underlying question is- Was Emily really possessed or did she have a medical condition? The film allowed the audience to make up their own opinion-The horror scenes were pretty intense and if you don’t believe in demons you might afterwards. Two Thumbs Up


Junebug- Indie Drama
The story of an older brother who grew up in a small town in North Carolina,
but had moved to the big city of Chicago, returns after three years to have his new bride meet his family.

Saratee Says: I had heard good things about this movie. I was excited when it came in the mail (netflix). Amy Adams was even nominated for an Oscar for Best Supporting Actress for her performance in this movie. I enjoyed the movie but felt it was missing something. It needed a bit more drama. It had these
moments, not sure what the cinematic definition is but there would be scenes without sound-I loved it- Captures the simple even boringness. A character study of sorts. One Thumb Up

3.08.2006

Are You Getting Paid What You're Worth

I had my review today at work- Strange thing- I have only been there 3 months- But they don't discriminate- The company has all employees reviewed at the same time rather than your hired anniversary date- My supervisor said I was doing a great job and felt like he was the lucky one- I fit into the department very well- He actually didn't really interview me when I originally went for the job- It was one of the easiest interviews- He never really asked those typical interview questions- (What are you strengths, weaknesses, How would you handle this situation) It was during their busiest time of year and he needed to hire someone fast- So he threw all his money on me- And I guess I haven't let him down- My review score was good- No problems, keep up the great work- He mentioned that not too far in the future he will most likely have me do more work- Important work- Which got me nervous- The kind of work I will gradually learn is stuff you don't want to mess up- Because you NEVER want to piss off Uncle Sam- He then told me what my raise would be- I wasn't sure if I heard that right- 16% increase- Yeah that is right people!! I got a huge raise and I have only been employed for 90 days- I can honestly say I am getting paid for what I am worth- That feels great- Lets go celebrate, first round is on me- Oh wait... sorry, I don't drink anymore- Let's go shopping.... oh yeah, I don't wander around stores and impulsively buy crap anymore- What am I going to do with all this money????

3.03.2006

Pimp My Cubicle

Umm...... this could (should) be my Million Dollar Idea- Why didn't I think of that- Well, since I am so far removed from the Hip & Trendy way of life- My pimp gear would most likely be a ceramic paper weight that looks like a cowboy hat, a feng shui statue of a "prosperous" buddha, and a feng shui crystal to increase the flow of good Chi, a postcard with an obscure image and motivational statement, and who could forget a vintage Hamm's Beer sign (the one with the moving Blue Waters)

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